Men changing diapers and the denigration of Fatherhood
Fatherhood in the Age of the Mother from the perspective of a new mother
The unique thing about human babies compared to all other species of babies on earth is the sheer amount of investment required by both parents in order for the child to thrive. In the days of old (50 years ago) around the world, men and women had rigidly segregated “childcare” roles, in which, feminists would like us to believe, the men did “nothing” while the women took on all the burden. Today, we are far more “advanced” in the equality between men and women, mothers and fathers as commercial after advertisement is the media wagging its moral finger at us that “good dads change the diapers too, good dads carry the baby on the hip while they do the laundry and fold the socks!” The mainstream tells us that a father, in essence, is only good when he is taking on the role of the mother. (And in fact a man is only acceptable when he is behaving like a woman).
But is this all parenting is? Let us limit ourselves to the stage when children require the most hands-on care, the stage from age 0-6 when they need help for everything from diaper changes to eating to burping to putting on their clothes. Babies are needy! As a new mother, I am well aware of the twenty-four seven attention that infants require and in fact I am typing this as my daughter sleeps peacefully on my chest and have written this in the stolen 15 minutes here and there that I can get. I have changed countless diapers, and cleaned up throw up, and breastfed and spent many countless nights soothing and burping and bathing the baby. It is a lot of work…but the reason I am able to do this work, is that I don’t have to do other work. I don’t have to wake up at 7am after a sleepless night of infant care and be at the office to make money.
I don’t have to mother on top of doing another job. This is because my husband is providing for us. He is taking on the cost of me being able to stay home and give all the care the baby needs from her mother right now. Why isn’t this a respected version of fatherhood? Why is a father only respected when he’s taking on a woman’s role?
In fact, if I were to go out and make money while I left my husband with pumped milk and a confused infant searching for her mother’s scent with no maternal instincts to help him…I would be considered “stunning and brave” by the matriarchy that holds modern society in her fist.
Fatherhood is a more invisible form of childcare because it is indirect. When a man
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